Monday, June 25, 2012

Arg!

I'm feeling extremely discouraged right now! I had a horrible run this morning! Ended up walking the majority of it. 71% humidity is just too intense!

I'm feeling like I should've chosen the novice half program to follow instead if the beginner... Uh, I don't know!

I had expected myself to be farther along in my weight loss by now! I just want to be skinny already! Or at least just plain overweight instead of obese! It makes me so mad! If I would've started the first time I was 197lbs I'd be done already!

I just wonder of I'll ever be comfortable in my body.... How much am I going to have to lose before I don't feel enormous?

My SIL always says she feels fat and she weighs 162lbs! Which I don't judge her by. I know all girls feel too big sometimes regardless if their size, but I started 98lbs heavier than that!

I just want to feel comfortable and be able to run without feeling like I'm dying! I want to wear something cute and FEEL cute!

Sorry for being a Debbie Downer, but that stupid run this morning really put a bad vibe on my day...

11 comments:

  1. I'm sorry that you are having a bad day. You WILL get there! You are doing such a great job! : )

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  2. I completely understand what you mean. I feel the same way! But just remember, all progress, even small progress, is still progress! The longer that you take to adjust to your new lifestyle, the more likely you will be to stick to it. You are doing amazing, keep it up!!!

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    1. I know! I just have to remember that it takes as long as it takes and I will get there! Thank you!

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  3. A bad run always used to put a damper on the day, sometdays it just doesn't feel right, and these days if i'm having a bad run I just tell myself that it's okay to walk a bit more this run, and it works that run is always great.

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    1. A few months back I had about 5 really bad runs in a row! I actually cried during one of them! I'm always afraid that will happen again!

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  4. I always tell people it took me 21 weeks to lose 10 lbs. It was the first 10 at 235 lb starting weight. I tell people this because I am still trying when I should have given up, because at 10 lbs in 21 weeks it will take me 3 to 4 years to be in a normal BMI range. That is ok. I am working on habits to last a lifetime and so are you. Enjoy your journey no matter how long it takes. Review what you can control and change and keep going with the healthy habits you have established.
    As for running in hot weather. Your body feels almost 30% more in hotter weather. So if you do 5 miles worth of work your body feels 6.5 miles. This is what a very good running friend explained when I did a 5 mile race a week ago. It helped. It also helps me remember I am moving 2 times the amount the people who developed the program and are getting out there are moving. Imagine that 1st place winner carrying 3 large bags of flour on their shoulders, I doubt they would be getting any where near what you can already do.

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    1. Wow! Thank you so much for this! It takes as long as it takes and I'm not giving up! I need to learn to enjoy the journey! Another blogger who is a huge inspiration of mine, told me that sometimes she misses the journey! I can't even imagine that!

      And I never thought about how I am out there doing it with a lot more weight than most other people!

      Thank you for giving me some prospective!

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  5. Girl I feel ya on the humidity...my race Saturday night was miserable because of it. Don't get down on yourself. You have and are still continuing to accomplish so much. We all have our good runs and bad runs, but you got out there and made it happen :)

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    1. Thank you! I want to get through this summer so bad!

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  6. I can relate to this whole post! Humidity - The weather has added over a minute to miles and I feel like I'm running in place sometimes, it's horrible! But just think if you can run through this, then you'll be a total bad ass by the time fall comes back around! (Just don't forget your water and be very conscious of what your body is telling you in this heat!) Weight loss - I had that same mentality for so long (I still do! These last 10 pounds should be gone, etc.), if I had just kept going when I first started losing weight I'd be so much closer to being done, yadda yadda. The thing is, this journey never ends, you don't just get skinny and stop, and part of the benefits to the journey taking longer is that you learn that and learn to appreciate it. By the time you've reached goal, you'll have had time to refocus and make new goals, that way you're never stagnant in your journey to health. And finally - I still feel fat. At least some days, and what I've come to realize is that I think even skinny girls feel this way lots of the time, I think it's normal and it's just something about learning to be happy with yourself and not so critical. I'll let you know if I ever figure that one out! ;) You're doing great, just keep up the amazing work and all of your goals will fall into place!

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