Peaceful

Today was the last day of our first running schedule. 28 minutes. I remember looking at that day 8 weeks ago and thinking it would never be possible. But I did it! I'm pretty sure I probably did 30 minutes or more. My phone, which was my timer, died at 24 minutes, so I just finished the loop we were doing. On Wednesday I ran 2.2 miles! I had a new personal record in both speed and distance. My pace was 12:34. We got our next 8 week schedule this week also. We go back to doing interval runs on Wednesdays, but we get up to 40 minutes straight also.

My grandma died Wednesday morning. I'm still not totally sure of what all really happened. I've gathered that she fell and hit her head Tuesday night and was being taken to the hospital by ambulance and went into cardiac arrest in the ambulance. They had her on a ventilator and morphine over night and she died about 530a on Wednesday. I feel really bad for my mom. She gets upset if she even hears about someone dying that she doesn't even know. They cremated her yesterday and are going to bury her ashes on Tuesday. I'm sad and I'll miss her, but I'm glad she gets to be at peace now. She was showing a lot of signs of dementia in the past couple of years. At least she doesn't have to completely lose her mind now.

Grandma with Elliott May 2010

I was going to work out last night, but didn't. I'm trying hard not to feel guilty about it. I worked out 4 days this week. There is no shame in that.

I weighed in on Wednesday with another 1.4 pound loss. It brings me to 217.4. 7.4 pounds until 50 pounds lost and I get to buy my Garmin!

My daughters birthday is in three weeks and I'm trying to get her party ready. I'm really not into it this year. I'm focusing on so many personal goals, I just don't want to lose sight of them. Her birthday is on St. Patricks Day and this year it is on Saturday, so I'm just going with a St. Pat's theme. I've reserved the building, bought a few favors, plates, napkins, and ordered this invites which I need to send out ASAP.

2 miles, here I come!

Last night we had a scheduled run. 27 minutes. We ran on the treadmill at the Y. I ran at a 4.0mp or above the entire time, which I had never done before. I finish 2.1 miles in 32 minutes (that included the 5 minute warm up walk). I'm so excited to run 2 full miles!

Not Happy!

Uh. Busy weekend. My mom came into town from Oklahoma yesterday. She came because my brother's girlfriends' mom is in town from Massachusetts. My mom said that she ought to come meet her now, so she doesn't have to meet her the day before their wedding. She met my MIL the day before our wedding, and Paul and I were together 5 years before we got married, lol!

So we were all going to go to dinner together. My brother called and said to meet at Red Robin at 630p. I was not happy about the restaurant choice and immediately started looking up nutritional information. After I looked at everything I had decided that I was going to either get the Crispy Fish Burger (around 560 calories) or a cup of chicken tortilla soup (around 170 calories) and have some french fries also. I really didn't want the soup, so I had kind of decided on the fish burger. When we got there I couldn't find the fish burger on the menu and started freaking out. I almost caved and got what I would usually get, The Bonsai Burger (around 1100 calories). I was saying "Well, what if I only eat half of it?" They came to take the order and I still hadn't decided and last minute decided to get the soup. I was not happy with the decision. When it came out, it was literally a cup of soup. It was good, which I was happy about, but it was gone in about 3 minutes. Then I ate probably about 10-20 french fries. Paul stopped eating when he had about 1/4 of his burger (1200 calories) and I ate some of it (the bottom part of the bread and the beef patty). My brothers girlfriend and her mom got these HUGE salads and I looked them up and they were 1400 calories!!!!!! I left feeling pretty shitty, but it could've been a lot worse! I was so glad to leave though. It is so loud in that place and then there was my daughter, who is usually well behaved, but my little siblings (4, 6, and 7) were there, so she was going crazy like they were.

Wednesday Weigh In

Weighed in today with a loss of 1.4 pounds! Not my goal of 1.9 a week, but I'll take it! It did bring me down to 218.8 which makes my 219 goal and a month early! Next stop, 210! A lady at WW told the leader that she could really tell I was losing weight and the leader told me and it made me smile! I really love going to the WW meetings!

We had a run today. 25 minutes. It sucked so bad! The whole time my back and feet were aching and I was having some intestinal discomfort as well. I stuck it out though. My shoe came untied towards the end and I had to stop to tie it and it pissed me off. I ran an extra minute and half to make up for lost time...

I talked to my mom on the phone tonight. She lives in Oklahoma City and she said she was thinking about coming for a visit this weekend. She asked if I had anything planned for Saturday and I told her that I had my run at 730a and then work afterwards until noon. She said she can't believe that I get up on a Saturday morning and run before work and that she doesn't know how I do it. I am determined! That's what I told her!

Hoping Saturday's run is much better!

Happy Valentine's Day!

I realized earlier that this will be Paul and I's 10th Valentine's Day together. I can still remember the first one 10 years ago, when he was just a guy that I had a crush on. My friend Lindsay and I had a "singles" Valentine's Day party. We had heart shaped pizza's and Paul brought heart shaped sugar cookies from the cake shop that he worked at the time. An entire decade! That seems so crazy to me. We usually don't really do anything special for Valentine's Day anymore, which I'm totally okay with. I hope he brings something home for Elliott though :)

Kim joined the Y last night and we did our run on the dreadmill again. Stephanie wanted to lift weights too, and we usually do, but I was still pretty sore from my TRX workout the day before. I did about 3 machines of upper body and then back extension. Then I saw that there were three treadmills open all next to each other, so Kim and I went over to snag them and Stephanie shortly followed. We had a 5 minute warm up walk (as always) and then 24 minute run. It seemed a lot easier in the beginning than it usually is. We had about 8 minutes left when I started to have that feeling like I wasn't going to be able to finish (even though I always do!). I had dinner a couple of hours before I went, but that was too close to run time. I had about 3 times when I felt a little pukey while running, with those puke-ish burps (or is that just me?). I did fine though.

Today is a rest day and I'm so glad! Elliott and I went to the Dollar Tree earlier and she got a butterfly Valentine's Day balloon, so she is happy! And not puking! I think I'm going to make some brownies for Paul... Let's hope this doesn't end badly!

Puke!

I'm home from work again today. This time it's with a sick little girl :( Yesterday morning she puked a little bit, then seemed fine. She puked again after breakfast ALL over me. She seemed fine the rest of the day, playing as usual. She even ate dinner without an incident. Paul laid her down to sleep in our bed last night and at about 145am she started puking again. It's so sad when she pukes and cries. I rinsed the vomit out of her hair and then she fell back asleep. I was up until about 4am, waiting for her to puke again, but she didn't. I was going to take her to the doctor, but it snowed a lot over night, so I'm going to wait to see if she pukes anymore. If she does, I'll make an appointment for tomorrow.

Other than that, I had my last free session with my trainer yesterday. We did TRX again. I'm sore today, but not even half as sore as I was last time. I did upper body with TRX, then rowed 600 meters on the rowing machine, then did lower body TRX, then we had me do some fartlek training on the track. Those were so hard because my legs felt like noodles! At the end we saw that I had earned enough points to redeem another TRX session, so we set it up for March 2 or 3, I can't remember. I have also earned enough points to do a free month of boot camp, so I'm signing up for his boot camp on Tuesday nights for March.

The other night, was walking by my running shoes and saw something inside of them. This is what I found:

Elliott had filled my shoe with dog food! She is a silly girl!

I have a 24 minute run scheduled for today. With all the snow, it looks like it will most likely be on the dreadmill! I'm not excited! Hopefully we'll have our regular scheduled run outside on Wednesday!

Self Talk WHile Running

I'm so glad that I took Friday off! It was a very much needed break from work!

Paul and I went to see Redtails and it was a really good movie! I almost cried in the theater, but get myself together. We ate lots of popcorn! Elliott had a pretty good time with Ted and Mary and Mary posted this picture to facebook, which made me laugh!

I got an email Friday afternoon that said that our Saturday morning run was canceled due to windchill temps. I was sad. Stephanie and I went to the Y Saturday afternoon and lifted weights and did our run on the dreadmill. It was 22 minutes after a 5 minute warm up run. I did 1.7 miles, which is a 15:52 min/mile pace. I want to get faster, but I know I need to work on my endurance first!

I feel like I have lots of highs and lows while running. My self talk is amusing:

I'm not going to look at the time until after this song is over.
Damn it! I accidently saw the time! 18 minutes left! I'm not going to make it.
Okay, just focus on the basketball game on the TV.
This sucks, this sucks this sucks!
I can do this! Only 10 minutes left!
I need to find a different song! I cannot run to a ballad!
Yes! This song is perfect! I feel so strong right now! I'm going to bump up my speed!
*30 seconds late*
Okay, that was too fast, I need to slow down!
*singing* Run fast for your mother, fast for your father! Run for your children for your sisters and your brothers! *singing*
Yes, 90 seconds left!
It's over! Thank goodness! I can hear my heart pounding in my ears!

I have my last free session with my personal trainer in about 90 minutes. I'm excited to tell him that I've met my goal of running a full mile! I'm excited to feel sore tomorrow too!

I Wish I Had Fallen In Love Sooner

Today is my Paul's 30th birthday. I took the day off today because I had originally planned to throw him a surprise party, but I'm just too focused on my health and fitness goals right now to do it. Plus we really don't have the extra money right now to spend on a big birthday party. Instead we are going to go to a movie that he wants to see (Redtails) while my brother and his girlfriend watch Elliott.

At Wednesday's weigh in I lost 2.6 pounds. I'm soclose to having lost 40 pounds! And that means I'm ahead of schedule for my next weight loss goal, which is 41 pounds lost by March 17!

I had planned on running Monday morning with Kim, but we had technical texting difficulties and it didn't happen. So after work, Stephanie and I went and ran at the Y on the treadmill along with some weights. I decided once and for all that I like running outside SO MUCH better than the dreadmill!

We also had a run on Wednesday night. I ran for the first time without my ankle brace and felt really good! The whole run felt fantastic! It was our last interval run. We did a 5 minute warm up walk followed by 10 minute run-3 minute walk-10 minute run. It was 2 miles! I finally felt like I loved running! I love how it allows me to push and challenge myself. I love how it is changing my body AND my mind! It's helping me achieve goals I never even knew I wanted to be possible! I love how I feel when I go harder, faster, longer! I just wish I would've fallen in love sooner!

My niece had a birthday party last Sunday and of course there was cake. My SIL offered me a piece and I declined. I think it offended her, but I don't really care. At the end of the party there was a HUGE glob of frosting on a cake board from the cupcakes and I wanted to eat a bite. I asked Paul "If I eating a bite of this frosting does that count as cake?" and he said "Yes!" and I said "But it's not cake!" and he said "Carrie, that is disgusting! The frosting is the worst part!" I didn't eat it. I almost did, but I didn't. On our way home I told Paul that I was glad that I didn't eat the frosting. Cake free until the year ends in 3!

Carrie

My First Mile

My ankle is doing better every day! I ran on it again on Wednesday (with the brace) and it actually felt the best it has since I injured it while I was running. Our run on Wednesday was 5 minute walk 8 minute run 5 minute walk 8 minute run.

A lot of people were talking in anticipation about today's run on Wednesday. 20 minutes, no walking. I talked to those around me trying to reassure them that we will be able to do this. We are training for this. Think back to 4 weeks ago when we were running for 30 seconds and it killed! That day we were running stints of 8 minutes and we would be fine. I was trying to reassure them as much as I was trying to reassure myself.

Skip to today. The 20 minute run day. When I got there Kim told me I looked like I was wasting away (!!!) and that she almost didn't recognize me! I'm still wearing the ankle brace. My ankle is still a little sore, bruised, and swollen, but it's getting better every day! I got there right on time and didn't have a lot of time to fret over the next 20 minutes. We started with some dynamic exercises and then we were off. For some reason, the first about 6 minutes were pretty tough. I didn't think I was going to make it, but I kept going, telling myself that my body can do this, it's my mind I have to convince. When he blew the 10 minute whistle to turn around, I was surprised. I felt like shorter than 10 minutes. We turned around and ran back. The last 40 yards I picked up my speed and powered through to the finish. I checked my running app on my phone and it said I just ran 1.6 miles! I ran my first mile! My first 1.6 miles!

I'm so incredibly proud of myself and my group. I don't think I saw a single person stop to walk! I can't believe it. I've run a mile! It seems like something that's probably so small to most people, but to me, it's huge! It's my first of many miles!

I lost 2 pounds at my weigh in this week. My goal was 1.9! I received my 25 pound WW charm!