My First Mile

My ankle is doing better every day! I ran on it again on Wednesday (with the brace) and it actually felt the best it has since I injured it while I was running. Our run on Wednesday was 5 minute walk 8 minute run 5 minute walk 8 minute run.

A lot of people were talking in anticipation about today's run on Wednesday. 20 minutes, no walking. I talked to those around me trying to reassure them that we will be able to do this. We are training for this. Think back to 4 weeks ago when we were running for 30 seconds and it killed! That day we were running stints of 8 minutes and we would be fine. I was trying to reassure them as much as I was trying to reassure myself.

Skip to today. The 20 minute run day. When I got there Kim told me I looked like I was wasting away (!!!) and that she almost didn't recognize me! I'm still wearing the ankle brace. My ankle is still a little sore, bruised, and swollen, but it's getting better every day! I got there right on time and didn't have a lot of time to fret over the next 20 minutes. We started with some dynamic exercises and then we were off. For some reason, the first about 6 minutes were pretty tough. I didn't think I was going to make it, but I kept going, telling myself that my body can do this, it's my mind I have to convince. When he blew the 10 minute whistle to turn around, I was surprised. I felt like shorter than 10 minutes. We turned around and ran back. The last 40 yards I picked up my speed and powered through to the finish. I checked my running app on my phone and it said I just ran 1.6 miles! I ran my first mile! My first 1.6 miles!

I'm so incredibly proud of myself and my group. I don't think I saw a single person stop to walk! I can't believe it. I've run a mile! It seems like something that's probably so small to most people, but to me, it's huge! It's my first of many miles!

I lost 2 pounds at my weigh in this week. My goal was 1.9! I received my 25 pound WW charm!

What Am I Doing???

I ran today. My ankle felt much better this morning, and then Stephanie brought me an air cast to work at that was even better. I ran around the office a few times and then decided that if I could get my shoe on with the cast, that I would run. And I did. And I'm glad I did. It doesn't feel any worse than it did before the run. And it still feels 100 times better than it did yesterday. I ran pretty slow, and I had to hold on to the treadmill handles some. I took it pretty easy...

This week we are really starting to build on endurance and I CANNOT miss this week! I am going to be running 20 full minutes with no walking on Saturday. I'm, most likely, going to be running a full mile for the first time in my whole life. I cannot miss these 5 and 8 minute runs and be able to keep up with the rest of my group.

Tomorrow I'll rest, and then we have a group run on Wednesday.

I really hope this was not a bad decision...

I Cried All Day

There is no way I'm going to be able to run tomorrow. Today my ankle hurts so much worse than yesterday and it is super swollen and bruised. I've continued to ice it, wear my compression sock, take ibuprofen, elevate.


I think I'm finally done crying about it now. I've accepted that I'll probably be about a week behind in my training schedule, but I'll be back up with everyone eventually.

I watched "The Spirit of a Marathon" today and cried. I talked about my foot and cried. And read a story of a local baby (a week older than Elliott) that died today (had Leukemia) and cried.

The baby dying is what really made me get over my pity party about my ankle. I kept imagining those parents and what they are going through. Just thinking about it is horrifying.

I recently had a dream that Elliott was a teeny tiny baby again and had to have surgery. I was watching the surgery and lots of things were going wrong. Next think I knew, I was carrying a basket with a pink ribbon tied around it (presumably her body was in the basket, though I never saw it) and I was carrying it up to these stairs on this sidewalk when I dropped to the ground and started crying. Even in the dream, the grief was so overwhelming that I woke up crying so hard I woke Paul up. He asked what was wrong and I said "I had a bad dream! Go get Elliott!" And he did and I felt better that my little girl was in my arms. I wish for that family that it was all a dream.

F*CK!

We had a group run this morning. I woke up, still, with a funky tummy, but decided to go anyway. As I was leaving I told Paul that I hoped I didn't vomit or, worse, poop my pants! I stopped by Dillons (the grocery store) and got some Immodium to see if that would help. I must have because the run was great! It felt a lot easier today. I didn't (nor did I even feel like I was going to) vomit or poop my pants. While we were doing our cool down walk and as I was rejoicing in the fact that all my bodily fluids stayed put I stepped off the concrete path and rolled my ankle and fell to the ground. My glasses flew off. I scrapped my knee. Joy. The two head guys running the group came over to me. They thought I had passed out. Nope, just stepped off that stupid path!

I wanted to cry so bad! Not because I was in pain, not because I was embarrassed, but because this is going to be a road block for me. I'm SO PISSED that this happened!

I've wrapped it, iced it, elevated it, heated it. It hurts. It's a little swollen and bruised. I'm just wondering how long it is going to be until I run again. I have a run scheduled on Monday, and I don't really intend to miss it. Our runs are amping up, and I really, really, really need all the practice I can get.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I hate this!