I Need Some Motivation!

I am in need of some big time motivation. I weigh myself a lot. I only consider my WW weigh in as "how much I weigh", but I still weigh at LEAST twice a day. Once in the morning and once at night. Before this morning, I had gained every day. I was getting really pissed. I was working out, I was staying within my calorie range, but the scale just kept going up. I got on this morning and had lost 3.2 pounds since yesterday, so that was a relief. I am blaming it on water retention. I went to lunch with my boss on Friday, then out to lunch with Kim and Stephanie Saturday, then shared a personal pizza with Elliott at Sesame Street Live on Sunday. Sodium overload?

We had a scheduled run last night. It was super nice outside and with daylight savings, we had more daylight, so we decided that we were going to run at the park instead of at the Y. We had planned on meeting at the park at 7pm. Paul's car broke down yesterday, so he went with a guy after work to go get it. He didn't get home until about 650p. At 645p, I had kind of decided that he wouldn't be home in time and that I wasn't going to run. I told my self that I'd do it tomorrow. Well, he got home and I texted them that I was just leaving and asked if they would wait for me. Well, the guy from work was still out in our drive talking to him and he started talking to me as well. I didn't end up leaving until about 715p. Our run was 15 minute run, 3 minute walk, 15 minute run. It sucked so so bad! I hated it the whole time! I actually started walking for a few seconds a few times, but they pushed me to do it and finish. I'm glad I did. It just shows me again that the only run you'll ever regret is the one you didn't do. It was funny because a rabbit ran up beside us and scared the beejeezus out of Kim! I thought that she was falling!

I wore the $20 headband on our run last night and it was totally worth it! It didn't slip at all!

Wednesday Weigh-In

I had my weigh in today and I lost 2.2 pounds this week! I was happy with that loss. I'm officially down to pre pregnancy weight!

I went to the Y last night to do my cross-training as part of the Start2Finish program. I did strength training and then 20 minutes on the elliptical. We have a group run tonight with Start2Finish. I hope it is easier than the run I did by myself on the treadmill on Monday!

I had a horrible day yesterday. Not in the fact that I ate bad (I did really well) or that I didn't exercise. I was just feeling down mentally. I kept second guessing myself, asking myself if I really had it in me to follow this through. Then my cousin posted some pictures on Facebook and said that she had lost 62 pounds, and it made me feel like my 30 was nothing and that I still have a LONG way to go. Because of this I spent a good portion of the day on Pinterest looking up motivational saying to help me through. There were two that stuck out to my feeling of yesterday:

 

I love, love, LOVE looking up motivational shit on Pinterest. It really helps me gain some prospective and keep my head in the right place!

Traveling

Last weekend Paul, Elle, and I went to St. Louis with Paula (my MIL) and Melanie (Paul's sister, my SIL). His grandma has been in the hospital and they were moving her from the hospital to a nursing home. She is 95 years old and has lived in her own apartment before now. We went to help clean out her apartment, and to visit. Neither Paul, nor I have seen her in about 6 years. It was nice for us to see her again, and for her to meet our daughter.

I have to say that I do have the best child ever! Out of the 16 hours we were driving, she slept about 4 of them, and the other 12, she was the most well behaved 20 month old of all time!

I was nervous about going, because of the eating. I knew that they would probably being eating fast food every meal. Bleh! I anticipated this ahead of time, so I ate half of a wrap from my lunch Friday before we left. And guess where the first stop was? McDonalds. I said "I haven't eaten McDonalds in over 2 months!" and Paul said "Neither have I, and I've been craving a McDouble!" He had two... skinny bastard! Melanie kept asking if I as sure that I didn't want anything. I assured her that I was SURE!

Both mornings, his aunt (who we stayed with) made a HUGE breakfast. I ate way more calories than my normal oatmeal, but I still stayed on plan. For lunch the Saturday they got White Castle, and I had an order or sweet potato fries and half of the "chicken rings" that I ordered. That night for dinner they were wanting to get fast food again, but I asked them to stop at a grocery store for me. I had grapes, a yogurt, and some almonds. I ended the trip eating WAY more than I would've liked to (because of the breakfasts) but was still within my points, using some of my weekly allowance.

Melanie was asking what keeps me motivated and I didn't know what to tell her. It is just something that has manifested within. I mean, when I was planning my wedding, I bought a dress that was 2 sizes to small and had a year to lose weight for it. I had to have the dress taken out. If you even a wedding can't motivate you to lose weight, than nothing will. It is truly something that has to come from within.

It's weird, because I can tell that they don't expect me to follow through and actually lose the weight this time. But this time is different. I don't know how or why, but it is. I can't wait to prove them all wrong. To show them all how strong I am. I'm willing to work for it. I know I can do it.